Thursday, January 24, 2013

Etiological Myth: Why Satan Betrayed Jesus(Adapted)


Back in the old days, Jesus once brought thirty six disciples including Satan himself to the submontane place and bid each of the followers take a pebble with them and headed to the mountain top. But greedy Satan took an extremely big one with him, for he thought Jesus would turn the stone into the same size of a bun.

They made it there toilfully, despite the trials and tribulations.

Upon seeing the exhausted disciples, Jesus then proclaimed, “Diligent as you fellows were should be acclaimed and prized.” He continued, “Now throw the pebble as far as you can, then you’ll get as gigantic a size as the bun is.” As a result, Satan had starved for the whole night because his huge stone couldn’t be thrown far.

The people launched their subsequent journey on the second day. At the middle of the road, disciples were told by Jesus to lift up one huge rock. Every disciple spared no efforts to raise it up, let the sweat deepened into the clothes and wet the whole body. But clever Satan wouldn’t let Jesus to play trick on him for second time. So he picked up a tiny pebble with a grin, as if celebrating his own winning. Then here came another rugged mountain that they ought to conquer.

They made it there toilfully, despite the trials and tribulations.

Upon seeing the exhausted disciples, Jesus then proclaimed, “Diligent as you fellows were should be acclaimed and prized.” He continued, “Now you’ll get a bun as the same size of the stone you lifted up.” Radiant as the disciples smiles were, they champed on their buns gaily, except Satan, His tiny bit couldn’t even fill the vacant of a tooth. Needless to say, Satan had starved for the other night.

There goes the other mountain stood firmly in front of them at day three. Spectacular yet dreadful, this mountain was the one the fellows had ever seen before. But they wouldn’t give up, striding and wading through the serpentine paths and finally made their way to the zenith.

Upon seeing the exhausted disciples, Jesus then proclaimed, “Diligent as you fellows were should be acclaimed and prized.” He continued, “Now please do pick two little pebbles with the same size, and I’ll tell you what to do next.” Satan knew what exactly Jesus was up to, so he picked up an extremely small pebble in one hand, and lifted up a gigantic one on the other, for he could get either huge buns with any of the stones on his hands, Satan narrowed his eyes with beaming smiles.

“My fellows,” Jesus said, “for those who has accompanied me for these days and nights, should be granted such special and magnificent presents … .” Jesus continued determinedly, ”That these two pebbles, would become your testicles from now on and even afterlife, take care and have a nice day!“

So Satan betrayed Jesus.






(It’s only an adapted story, please forgive me if there’s any offense.)

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